I am attracted to older men. I admit it. Like a moth to a flame. Like putty in their hands...
I don’t want to be, it just happens. I can’t help
When I see their faces, something inside me pushes me towards them.
Their eyes tell stories, hold memories, locked away... sometimes leaked out through tears.
Before you judge, let me share more of the older men
I am drawn to. They are elderly, think fragile. They are alone, sometimes a bandage framing their foreheads. A fall causing a break of the skin, similar to paper,
dotted with scars of long life, too much sun, and repeat hospital visits.
They are parked in wheelchairs, off to the side or left in
the middle of a room, no chair beside them for a chance encounter with a fellow
To be stared at from the other side of the room.
Airports are where we meet.
Last week I waited to board a flight when I spotted him. Exactly
as I described above.
I looked for an opportunity to speak with him.
He was a bit flustered, his hands fiddling between his wallet and ticket.
rang. An opportunity to stand and walk away from others, not sharing my one
sided conversation. A quick call and I found myself behind his wheel chair. I walked around
to where I could see his face and he could see mine.
I bent down, quietly
asked if he was traveling alone. Yes. I asked if he needed anything, possibly a
I pointed to where I was sitting, telling him to wave if
he needed anything. He thanked me. That was it.
I watched for the next thirty minutes. No one
looked at him, spoke to him or acknowledged his presence.
My heart broke
Always my response.
I thought back to a flight a few years ago. I had recently
lost my dad, quickly and painfully. I had been flying to visit my mom, with a
layover in Dallas. It was late at night when I saw him. Alone, in a wheelchair,
fragile, having recently suffered the loss of his wife. He loved her dearly. He
told me so. He was devastated and did not know if he would survive. His honesty
and grief broke my heart, changed me forever.
I wrote about this on November 30, 2012. http://Love One Another
I struggled that night with how he could be left to travel so far alone, in such a broken condition. I struggled with the people around me who failed to see him. I struggle every time this happens. Then I began to think of the people I don’t see... but
The people I walk by, ignore... yet you reach down, looking into their eyes.
You lift up, bandage, hold tight as you wipe away tears.
I am broken in my desire to help another human.
I imagine it will always be this way.
It reminds me...
of my role.
To simply encourage who God puts in my path. My role is not to push you, shame you or force you into my role.
As the Bible talks about the many parts of the body of the church
in Romans 12:4
“For just as each of us has one body with many members, and
these members do not all have the same function.”
I am grateful that we share this body of the church, of sisters and brothers. I hope we find our roles today and are able to lift another up.
I have been lifted up countless times by this body... and you have allowed me to find my role.
Who are you when you have to write it down... on paper?
This is hard for me, yet clarifying.
It's a commitment, as if I have signed a document swearing to uphold, protect, be... real.
It makes me dig deep, look inwardly for a few minutes to be sure my walk is lined up with my talk.
I'm a slow learner but I'm getting there. My daughter is twenty four and she has known who she is for years.
She helped process my gifts and talents and we understand how we differ and compliment one another.
What joy that is.
I recently needed to provide a bio.
I've written them before, boring lists of information no one wants to read. How do you talk about yourself without appearing puffed up? Trust me, there is no puffing up going on over here.
This time I decided to just go with my heart.
Married to the Bobster, mama to Sunny (Alexandria) and the Nino (Daniel). Born and raised in N.Y., she and the hubs moved to the land of corn, Champaign, IL. to raise their family, and cheer for all things Illini! The family gravitated to Nashville, TN. for school and work and this is where community is being built.
Dale is an ENFJ on the personality charts which means she rarely gets tired, loves to meet people, go places and do fun things…. while her family wishes she would just take a nap, so they could. Dale loves building genuine community, meeting people different from herself and learning from them. One of her greatest joys is watching people find their God given talents and use them for His kingdom. When we say, “Here I am God, have your way.” That is joy.
Dale was The Director Of Volunteers at Living Alternatives, A Pregnancy Resource Center in Champaign, Illinois, where she learned what grace truly looked like. She credits her bosses and coworkers for showing her every day what it means to lay your life down for one another. Dale was an active board member for FCA and Pinnacle Forum (Transforming Leaders to Transform Culture) and led the first Women’s Pinnacle Forum group. Pure Joy! She has mentored high school women through small groups and camps. She and her family are finding authentic community at Cross Point Church in Nashville and look forward to God’s continued opportunities that sometimes come through storms and other times sunshine.
She clings to words that remind her of her purpose and goals.
“I am to be about my Fathers business.”
“I will never regret the times I was generous, only greedy.”