I love this post from Catalyst. I think of these questions often and I am going to dig deeper into each of them in the coming weeks. Looking at these in ink I me see the importance and timeliness. Perhaps you are at a crossroads, wondering which path to take, which blind trail to blaze, or stumble down. Life feels like that sometimes, doesn't it?
These questions are worthy of our time and consideration as they will lead us to the path that is less traveled, but of greater joy. The path that will lead us to relationship and community.
We need to answer them personally before we can inquire of others.
Let's
go authentic.
Let's
go.
From CATALYST
10 Questions to Know and Be Known
Want to figure out if what you do defines who you are?
Try introducing yourself without sharing what you do for a living.
If
you attended Catalyst East in Atlanta not long ago, you heard a series
of session that probed this issue of identity – how and why we are known
– to ourselves, to others, and to God. I sat down with Peter Greer, Lab
speaker at Catalyst East, and we discussed how the way we introduce
ourselves and engage others may be in need of a refresher. Peter called
us to pay attention to our intros:
“When you meet someone, do you always lead with ‘
Hello, my name is Peter Greer, and I work for HOPE International.’
Is there more to it than that? Not that you go to the extreme and never
talk about what you do, but do you really believe that you have an
identity apart from the work that you do?”
Does What You Do Define Who You Are?
We
seem to think that our job defines us, and yet what we do can and
likely will change throughout our life. But who we are – that’s
something deeper, something we seldom offer when meeting someone.
What
if instead of a resume, we offered our life mission statement. For
example I might say “I equip Christians to think, live, and lead with
abundant faith.” That’s my personal mission, to be a catalyst for growth
in the faith journey of as many Christ followers as possible. Within
that description, I could do a lot of stuff. But that’s my heart. It
tells you a lot more about my true identity than, “I work here or with
them or I have a hand in this.”
I fear some of us would find such
clarity intimidating for fear the next question about life mission would
be directed to them: “So what’s your life mission?”
Uh….
Awkward.
I’m
not saying we should try to create uncomfortable conversations
(although growth requires tension), but to truly know someone, we need
to get past rattling off job titles and credentials. What I do may
change, but who I am remains.
In some ways, it’s rather like a
cruise ship. What we see on the surface is what impresses most of us.
The food, the three-story pool slide, the food, the tennis courts, the
Broadway shows, the food…. But it’s what lies beneath that determines
the success or failure of the voyage. It’s the rather unsightly engines
and seemingly insignificant rudder that ultimately have more to do with
whether or not we enjoy the journey.
Ten Questions to Discover Someone’s True Identity
One
of Peter Greer’s suggestions to fix this problem is to ask better
questions when first getting to know someone. Try these introductory
questions on to see if they fit you:
So what do you do when you’re not [fill in the blank with his or her occupation]?
How can I be a help to you?
What’s going on in the Kingdom of God that’s really captured your heart of late?
How do you want to be remembered?
How can I best pray for you?
So what do you want to be when you grow up? [insert smile here]
If you could accomplish one thing in life, what would it be?
If you could change one thing in the world, what would it be?
If you could only choose one word to define you, what would you want it to be?
With
what person in the Bible do feel you have the most in common? [Hint: If
they pick Barabbas, it may be a good time to walk away.]
By
intentionally asking meaningful questions, we put the focus on the other
person – and invite them to return the relational volley.
We can take it one step further faster if we are willing to
be authentic first.
If the other person seems reluctant to respond, why not share what’s on
your heart of late, if appropriate. By going first, you let them know
you are sincere about your offer of an authentic conversation to truly
get to know them.
As my friend Dick Savidge of Ministry Coaching
puts it:
“When we share our resume, we invite comparison; when we share
our vulnerability, we invite community.”
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